Thankfully, this past week was considerably better than the week before. Even so, I still spent far too much of it feeling sorry for myself. Part of it was due to not having any luck with jobs. After I got fired, I couldn't find a job to save my life. I applied for job after job after job with very little response, and had some horrific interviews. Each letter/email/phone call I received saying I didn't get the job felt like a major rejection. Why wasn't I good enough? What was wrong with me that I couldn't even get shitty jobs that I didn't really want, but desperately needed? School opened up a whole new world for me, and I was finally happy. I felt like I'd found myself and that I was right where I needed to be.
School is out for the summer, and I wasn't lucky enough this time to be picked to work at my current job. I figure I'm already looking for summer work, so I'll just look for something to replace my current job. I have absolutely no respect for my boss, or my coworkers, so it seemed like a win-win situation to find something to carry me through the summer and through the next year of school.
Only now I feel like I'm right back where I was before I started school. I feel like I'm getting rejection letters left and right, and all those feelings keep rushing back when I least expect it. I especially worry that I won't find a good job after graduation, and be stuck with a mounting student loan bill that I can't afford to pay. Did I really make the right choice in going back to school? My heart tells me yes, but only time will tell.
Someone also gave me a lecture that I wasn't interested in hearing. When I told said person that I didn't want his advice, he still kept going on and on. I shouldn't have to justify my life choices to anyone, and yet, I do...
Another thing I was bummed out about was that only two bloggers have signed up for my annual Christmas in July dog swap. That's the worst turnout I've ever had. But then I realized that at least two bloggers joined in, which is better than none at all. And hopefully those two will be very happy with their swaps. That's all that really matters - that everyone who takes part is happy and had fun doing it.
Some other stuff happened too, but I don't want to bore everyone with my problems. It's in the past, and that's exactly where it should stay!